There is an estimate of 3.1 million undergraduate student-parents in universities across the United States according to the most recent National Postsecondary Student Aid Study (NPSAS).
This means 18% of the current undergraduate student population are parents according to NPSAS.
Student-parents have the difficult job of raising their child(ren), doing schoolwork and often working jobs to make ends meet.
Aryan Rai, an international student from England, getting a masters in education from Westminster, recently became a student-parent this month to a newborn.
“I think, as a student parent, you have to figure out a way to balance your schedule,” Rai said. “School is already a little bit difficult to stay on top of when you don’t have a child. But then when you’re waking up in the middle of the night to take care of the kid, and you’re tired and you still have your assignments to do, it becomes a lot more tricky.”
Chelsea Hume, a sophomore and double major in art and psychology, has been a student-mom for 4 years. After getting her associate in psychology at Salt Lake Community College, she decided to pursue her undergraduate at Westminster while raising her 4-year-old son, Greyson.
The following interview has been lightly edited for clarity.
Q: Can you tell your story of how you came to be here at Westminster?
A: I went to Salt Lake Community College, and I got my associate in psychology. What inspired me to want to pursue a psychology career is when I was a teenager, I was in state custody. When I was going through that, it opened me up to my own therapist [who] helped me during those times. That’s what inspired me to want to be a therapist.
I want to work with juveniles in those types of state facilities. That’s what inspired me to go and get a psychology degree.
Q: Can you talk about your son Greyson? What does your relationship with him look like?
A: He just turned four in October. He is a very energetic, social boy. Every time we go to the grocery store, he’s talking to every single person and he’ll sing new songs from Blippi. He is a very social butterfly. I love him to death. I wasn’t planning on having kids. He was actually a surprise…but I’m so glad that it happened.
Q: How would you say you manage your time between classes and homework, while parenting and taking care of Greyson?
A: I get up at six in the morning, and sometimes I don’t go to bed at 1 or 2 a.m., and it’s a lot of balancing. A lot of times I have to ask my friends to watch him. Like today for instance, he’s with my friend, because he wasn’t in preschool today. It is a lot of time away from him, which is hard right now, but I hope that in the end, it’ll be worth it because I’ll be able to provide a better life for him.
He will also be able to see that you can achieve your goals as long as you’re determined and you’re working hard and you’re doing it despite what obstacles may come.
Q: What are some specific challenges you face as a student parent that others might not see?
A: There’s a lot of times where I have to do an assignment real quick because he was taking my attention all day while I was trying to do the assignment. Also like having your mind somewhere else [is a challenge]. I’ll be in class or something, and I’m not really focused on the class because I’m thinking about what he’s doing.
Q: Many student-parents can experience guilt either as a student or as a parent. Do you experience guilt and how do you navigate that?
A: I definitely do experience guilt, being away from him, because I didn’t think I was going to go to a secondary school. But actually, right after I had Grayson, I had two credits I needed from SLCC to get my associate. So I did, and that was easy because I was at home and I could do the online thing. And he was a baby at that time, so that was easy.
Then right after I graduated, Westminster actually contacted me. At first I was like, there’s no way that I’ll be able to go here.
But then looking into it, I just made sure I had a goal, and I was like I’m just going to do what I need to do to get into the school. I knew, going into psychology, I was going to have to get a bachelor’s and honestly, the reason why I was able to go here is because I got scholarships for being a single mom.
So I do feel guilty being away from him, but I do know that in the end, it’ll be worth it. So that’s how I navigate that. I just try to think of the end result, to mitigate my guilt for being away from him.
Q: Do you feel like Westminster has provided you enough resources in general, for student-parents?
A: I feel like Westminster is supportive, but I do feel like it would be beneficial to have a daycare on campus. That’s one thing that SLCC did have. I didn’t have a child at the time, but they do have a daycare.
So I just think that maybe one thing that they could implement, maybe in the future is having a daycare. I know there’s not a lot of parents that go here, but there might be in the future. But other than that, they’ve all been really supportive.
Q: How do you feel being a parent influenced the way you approach your education?
A: I definitely feel like it does influence my education, like my motivations for going to school. When I first started, back when I was 22, it was way different than now. The motivation to do good in classes is a lot higher. The motivation to finish is a lot higher as well, because I want to go on and get that career.
I’m a lot more patient since I became a parent, which, if you would have known me before, I didn’t have any. So becoming a parent has been beneficial to me in that way.
It does give me a different perspective, especially when we’re talking about, in my psych classes, families or children, which is the demographic I want to work with. So yeah, it’s been very beneficial.
Q: Did you have anything you wanted to leave for other student-parents?
A: I would just say don’t think that your efforts are lost on your children. We were driving past the school maybe a couple weeks ago, and Greyson was like: oh, that’s mommy’s school, that’s mommy’s school. And that was really cool to hear that. He actually recognizes that it’s my school and that I actually go to school. So don’t think that your efforts are lost on your children because they are paying attention.
